FAQs About Couples Counseling
How long will couples counseling take?
Every relationship is different and your counselor can often give you a preliminary estimate about how (4-6 sessions) is appropriate. For moderate or seriously conflicted relationships we recommend that you consider committing to 8-10 sessions and assess at that point about further appointments. Couples counseling can be uncomfortable at times, so we encourage you to suspend making any decision about whether or not the counseling is helping until after at least eight sessions.
Will you always try to keep our relationship together?
Our counselors believe that we get into relationships for a reason and it’s important to sort out, whenever possible, why there is disconnection. Often with the right kind of support, some of the most difficult conflict can be transformed into an opportunity for a new and different kind of relationship.
What if my partner doesn’t want to come into couples counseling?
This happens very often. If you want to do counseling and your partner doesn’t want to, we often recommend making the appointment for yourself. If you are willing to talk about your concerns and work with your counselor on improving your reaction to your partner, we can sometimes invite your partner into sessions to help continue that work. You can try to unilaterally take responsibility for your end of the issues and relax any blame or expectations that your partner will do the same. Your counselor may be able to speak to your partner in this context and begin to address any obstacles to further participation.
Alternatively, we find that negative relationship patterns can change even when one person decides to get serious help for themselves without their partner’s participation. When you make changes consistently, over time, it necessarily induces your partner into a different pattern of behavior. Our counselors can help you look for opportunities for change even through individual relationship counseling or coaching.
How do we prepare for couples counseling?
It will be helpful for your