Our Philosophy

Our couples counselors will help give you a new “lens” to see the most important details of why relationships either fall apart or thrive:

Finding Love… and Keeping It:

Falling in love gives us the intoxicating feeling of being alive, whole, and happy. It makes us act in ways we don’t normally, but this magical feeling is not supposed to last.

Romance fades and the “hidden agenda” in our relationship emerges from our differences. Keeping love depends not on finding the right partner, but on becoming the right partner. If we are willing to grow and change, we can learn the skills needed to have a successful relationship.

Conflict is Not the Enemy: Conflict in relationships is actually a blueprint for mutual growth and healing. When we listen to the messages embedded within our conflicts, it teaches us about our deepest unmet needs and how to be fulfilled and happy.

Couples Counselors

The Way to the Heart is Through the Brain: Our brains are highly adapted to protect us from anything that might be perceived as a threat to our survival. At certain points in every relationship, we hurt our partners when we are just trying to protect ourselves. Our natural and automatic fight/flight/freeze responses occur in how we talk and act. It takes a high level of awareness and the practice of specific skills to identify and eliminate unsafe communication in a relationship and develop habits that cultivate love and affection.

A New Way of Talking: It is possible to express differences and frustrations
with your partner while remaining connected in a way that actually enhances your appreciation and love for each other.

Consequences of an Unconscious Relationship:

If we do not become aware of how we react unconsciously (automatically) when we feel threatened by our partner, we will blame, criticize, sh